“Normal is getting dressed in clothes that you buy for work and driving through traffic in a car that you are still paying for - in order to get to the job you need to pay for the clothes and the car, and the house you leave vacant all day so you can afford to live in it.” -Ellen Degeneres
“In the beginning there was nothing. God said, 'Let there be light!' And there was light. There was still nothing, but you could see it a whole lot better.” -Ellen Degeneres
"Procrastination isn't the problem, it's the solution. So procrastinate now, don't put it off."
-Ellen Degeneres
"I don't need a baby growing inside me for nine months. For one thing, there's morning sickness. If I'm going to feel nauseous and achy when I wake up, I want to achieve that state the old fashioned way: getting good and drunk the night before." -Ellen Degeneres
One of my favorite moments on Ellen's TV show. Hilarous!
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